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Dumpster Diaries: Decluttering When I Can’t Do Anything Else- More Kitchen Progress!nom

I am feeling very accomplished now- even if it’s only a little bit at a time

As I wrote in my earlier post, I’ve been purging thanks to my Facebook friend Marilyn, who introduced me to Flylady.net this month.I am still gaga over the microfiber cloths that I bought on Amazon!

on the ‘flight plan’ today from flylady.net was the fridge- this thing is SOOO clean now, thanks to those microfiber cloths!

On the ‘flight plan’ was the refrigerator. I pared down all the ‘art’, school stuff, old reminders, magnets and threw away the bread and crap that R always puts up there to keep safe from the Newfs (if you put loaves on bread on the counter, they WILL eat it- ugh). I normally use stainless steel appliance spray to clean and shine the thing, but a wet microfiber cloth did the trick-followed by a shine with a dry one!

In the midst of the cleaning frenzy, I spied my cousin outside the house on his motorcycle, so I went out there to meet him… he wasn’t there, but I found a banana and small apple near the door. He’s my #1 prime suspect for gnome bestower. He won’t even admit to leaving the fruit! Maisie enjoyed the banana, but she threw the apple over the side of the porch rail…

Prime suspect for gnome leaver is my cousin… I saw him on his motorcycle through the window- and when I went outside, I found a banana by my door. Maisie enjoyed it.

I continued to work in the kitchen while he was tracing the electrical from the room to the breaker box yesterday.

BEFORE pic of the gross microwave area in my kitchen

The cloths worked like magic on my electric kettle and coffee maker!

After pic of kettle

this is the best my coffee maker has looked since I bought it!

I tackled the disgusting microwave and the surrounding counter. I almost didn’t do this. SO yucky! I had 27 things to throw away (well, I have to do this daily), so I opted to throw tea boxes and old bread.

getting rid of the boxes of tea and putting them all in one wicker box

I have seen this done in restaurants

I HOPE I remember that the tea is in here!

Moving the microwave completely grossed me out! I am so angry with myself for letting this go as long as I did.

I was in shock when I moved the microwave. Just disgusting!

underneath *shudder*

AFTER!!! Now I hope it STAYS like this.

After I finished the microwave area, R informed me that the electricity in the house was being turned off, so Maisie and I retired to the front porch. She found my mother’s magazines on the couch and started to tear them to pieces read them. C decided to mow the lawn and take the trash out while our house was dark, too, which was fantastic of him!

It was a very productive day yesterday and I am looking forward to doing the taping/mudding/spackling of the back room today!
  

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Gnome Issues: THE SICK BASTARDS

gnoe

Gnome madness continues.

Mr. Tickles the Gnome (that’s what he was named, so he wouldn’t scare the baby) is one scary m*thaf*cka.

This is NOT something I want to see when I am half-awake and going out to the porch to get my paper.

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Serious Weirdness: GNOMES keep showing up out of NOWHERE in my yard!!!

The newest batch of mystery gnomes- even Maisie doesn't know what to make of them!

The latest batch of mystery gnomes- even Maisie doesn’t know what to make of them!

This has been an on-going problem for about a year now.

I bought a funny gnome last year and placed it in my yard. I KNOW where that one came from…

this was my first gnome.  I bought him and I know where he comes from.

this was my first gnome. I bought him and I know where he comes from. The writing beneath his feet says “Say Hello to my Little Friend”

Suddenly, another appeared.  I didn’t think too much of it- and I asked everyone in the house, no one here purchased any additional gnomes.

this was the first

this was the first “mystery” gnome to show up. He is unassuming and I didn’t find him for quite some time…

Not long after THAT, I found ANOTHER one that looked like it was smoking weed in my garden- I KNEW that couldn’t be a fluke.  I don’t even know where to buy a marijuana smoking gnome, for god sakes!

Again, I question the people in my house, folks on Facebook, family members- no one ‘fesses up.

the weed smoking gnome that really started to get me rather freaked out- he showed up this year, earlier in the spring

this is the weed smoking gnome that really started to get me rather freaked out- he showed up this year, earlier in the spring

Months went by and I forgot about the previous gnome incidents until this evening, when I discovered not ONE, but THREE little gnomes sitting in a messy garden bed near my steps.  They are “Hear No Evil, See no Evil, Speak no Evil” gnomes. I was told by the manny that they’d been there for about a week- I didn’t even NOTICE THEM (as usual) til today.  I’ve not been very vigilant about weeding my garden beds this year, so I have no idea whether there may be more of them in the underbrush or what…

the three little gnomes that appeared today

the three little gnomes that appeared today

People have suggested that I ‘take them on adventures’- but I don’t have just ONE gnome, I have an ENTIRE FREAKING COLONY FORMING!!  If I took them anywhere, it would look like the gnome version of Jim Jones’ colony in Guyana.

I might as well make gnome-sized grape kool-aid and resign myself to this every-growing invasion of gnome-titude.

Whoever my gnome benefactor(s) is/are, thank you.  You’re twisted people who obviously delight in driving me crazy.

I am officially perplexed.  This is one of the funniest, weirdest, longest running mysteries to ever happen to me.